Bored on a Wednesday Morning?


How about Attending the Goofiest Breakfasts You’ll Ever Have


Who does anything interesting on Hump Day? How about singing, exercising, telling silly jokes, having a hearty breakfast, and learning some fascinating facts to start your day and get you through the rest of the week?

Hello, Ham!”
“Hello, Egg!”
You might not be a morning person, but this is egg-citing. You can only applaud with your hands, and you may get to see someone’s surgery scar.
Tell a silly joke, sing some silly songs, do some simple exercises. Have a hearty breakfast and have a hearty laugh. Everyone is welcome, and all will bear a smile.
What if the Marx Brothers started a Rotary Club? That’s how this group describes itself.
And it’s been around for nearly 100 years.
One of the best-kept secrets is the L.A. Breakfast Club that meets every Wednesday for wild fun, impromptu chats, and a great way to start the day and get through the rest of the week.
Past speakers who showed up at these breakfasts included politicians, authors, comics and Olympians discussing topics like true crime, graffiti, puppets, silent movies, jazz and more. As club members say, some of the ladies (who were allowed to become members in 1978) will knit during the talks but it doesn’t mean they’re not paying attention. And, if you’re at the particularly rowdy Rooster table, you’ll have to do a lot of crowing.
The first meeting of the club happened March 6, 1925, with a group that included oilman Edward Doheny, director Cecil B. DeMille, studio moguls Darryl F. Zanuck, Louis B. Mayer and the Warner Brothers (Jack and Harry). They bought a piece of Griffith Park at 3201 Riverside Drive and built the Friendship Auditorium where they now meet.
Steeped with tradition, the Pledge of Allegiance is followed by a “Ham n’ Eggs” song and then a bizarre shanty about getting seasick called “Sea, Sea, Sea.” They will decipher their strange cryptogram, then do some arm-waving morning exercises. Don Snyder will entertain with some vaudeville-style piano accompaniment as he has done for more than a quarter century.
New members are inducted by sitting on an old sawhorse while being blindfolded and sticking their hands into a dish of two sunny side up eggs.
Yep, it’s the same sawhorse that Walt Disney and Ronald Reagan sat on when they joined.
Members have included “Tarzan” writer Edgar Rice Burroughs, theater mogul Carl Laemmle, baseball great Joe DiMaggio and Western star Tom Mix. Today you’ll see notable people in the local business world, people in the news, and people you’ve seen on the big and small screens — a recent past president is up-and-coming young actress Lily Holleman.
Breakfast is $25 and includes a buffet of cereal, oatmeal, eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, juice and options for vegans and vegetarians.
A recent meeting I attended was a “Show and Tell” by members. First, they made their club announcements and boasted about some events that fed more than 230 mouths. The president was also very excited about getting new credit card readers, so they didn’t have to do everything by hand.
Some of the show-and-tells included one member’s favorite thing to do — opening coconuts — and what she does with the shells: a vase, soap dish, and more. Another member displayed his collection of Paco Pascual memorabilia, who is a rip-off of Donald Duck. One guy brought a shaving brush passed down from his grandfather, and another talked about raising money to send a grenade launcher to Ukraine.
I was most fascinated by the piece of the fence that once stood at the grassy knoll where they think a second shooter shot from in order to kill President John F. Kennedy. That could fetch up to $30,000 online, they said.
Upcoming Wednesday mornings will host a toy design legend, a historian talking about the Santa Monica Pier, and “Saturday Night Live” alum Melissa Villaseñor.
No matter what the topic, or what is being discussed, you are guaranteed to belt out chuckle and forget the troubles going on in the world around you.
Even arch enemies like Los Angeles Times publisher Harry Chandler is photographed shaking hands with Los Angeles Examiner publisher William Randolph Hearst in a rare moment during breakfast.
And, even the dourest U.S. president Calvin Coolidge is said to have cracked a smile when greeted at the club by humorist Will Rogers.
Check out the Event Schedule and Buy Tickets at www.labreakfastclub.com.

You can reach Mike at mikeszy@aol.com.

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